John,
I am amazed at all you do for me in general. You are such an amazing man and sometimes I can't believe you're mine. You watch over me and you love me even when I feel like I don't deserve it. Through our IVF you took care of me. You were patient with me. You continually asked me what I needed even when I didn't know what I needed for myself. You did everything I needed you to do for me, even the things I could never have imaged I would have needed. Things I will never tell anyone because they're intimate and personal. You were sweet to me when I was screaming in pain and waking you up at 3am.
I love you more than you'll ever know. I knew how lucky I was to have you before we went through IVF and everything you did for me during only strengthened that knowledge. I appreciate that you never questioned what I needed and you genuinely listened when I was desperate for relief, grasping for answers. I can't wait to have children with you because I know they'll feel just as loved. I can't wait to watch you with them, showering them in unconditional love, kindness, and wisdom. I can't wait to experience all of this with you because I know I'll have an equal partner. I love hearing about you talk about us having children. How you'll love. How you'll be there for them, us. How you're excited to walk through this journey together.
I love you, Always
Angelica
Upcoming: Our November FET
Sunday, December 17, 2017
Saturday, December 16, 2017
Our September IVF
When we initially found out we would realistically need IVF to have a family I was extremely nervous. I have a fear of needles and I wasn't sure I could endure an IVF. One because of all the shots due to medications but second because then you undergo a minor procedure to collect the eggs. I just wasn't sure if I was strong enough to overcome my fear no matter how much I wanted a family.
We approached our September IVF with new resolve. While our July IVF was disappointing I think the trust in our Dr really helped us stay hopeful for this one. Going through the medications seemed to go really seamlessly. I was proud of myself for continually getting better administering my shots and it became almost a challenge for me to be able to do them quicker. Sometimes I would get in my way and overthink it which made them difficult even though I had been doing them for a while. Our ultrasounds went really well and at my first monitoring ultrasound my Dr was impressed with my follicles. She had me continue my medications for a couple more days and then John gave my trigger shot. Thursday, September 21, 2017 we had our egg retrieval. It went a lot smoother than I expected mostly on my end. I know they do this for a living so I wasn't doubting them just me. I will say the nurse who put in my IVF did an excellent job. She got it on the first try and it didn't even hurt. She is a pro for sure and I was appreciative of that fact. We retrieved 27 eggs and of those 27 eggs 25 were mature.
Recovery from egg retrieval was really rough for me. I expected to be bloated, tender, and out of it for a couple days. Potentially getting OHSS making it worse but I didn't expect what I went through at all. My retrieval was on a Thursday so I took Thursday and Friday off and I always have the weekend off. So 4 days recover which I figured was plenty based on other stories I had read. I figured I would still be sore but it would be manageable. By Friday I was in extreme pain, considering going to the ER because I had no idea what was going on. Every time I moved I screamed I was in so much pain. I could only sit 1 way and I couldn't sleep laying down no matter how much I wanted to. We talked to my nurse and she said she thought I was just constipated due to what I had told her and because everything was swollen from IVF it was making it worse. We told her what stool softened I had been taking and she mentioned to take 2 others instead. Saturday nothing had changed. I still couldn't sleep laying down and I was waking up every couple hours due to shifting and being in pain. I couldn't get up or do ANYTHING without help. Saturday John got me some milk of magnesia which is supposed to work relatively quickly without being too harsh on the system. So literally at this point I have taken 4 different stool softeners to ease/relieve the pain. I was desperate for something to work.
Overall it took me a week and a half to recover. Even once I had some relief from the constipation I still couldn't sleep laying down for a couple days. Once I could I was only able to sleep on my back and I still couldn't get up own my own. Normally in an IVF you transfer 3 or 5 days after your egg retrieval. Because I was in so much pain we had to do a freeze all which meant when we were ready we would have to do a frozen embryo transfer (FET).
Our September IVF Results:
27 eggs retrieved - 25 mature
18 fertilized via ICSI
18 made it to day 3
6 made it to day 5
10 total made it to day 6 freeze <3
Upcoming: Absolute Thank You To My Husband
We approached our September IVF with new resolve. While our July IVF was disappointing I think the trust in our Dr really helped us stay hopeful for this one. Going through the medications seemed to go really seamlessly. I was proud of myself for continually getting better administering my shots and it became almost a challenge for me to be able to do them quicker. Sometimes I would get in my way and overthink it which made them difficult even though I had been doing them for a while. Our ultrasounds went really well and at my first monitoring ultrasound my Dr was impressed with my follicles. She had me continue my medications for a couple more days and then John gave my trigger shot. Thursday, September 21, 2017 we had our egg retrieval. It went a lot smoother than I expected mostly on my end. I know they do this for a living so I wasn't doubting them just me. I will say the nurse who put in my IVF did an excellent job. She got it on the first try and it didn't even hurt. She is a pro for sure and I was appreciative of that fact. We retrieved 27 eggs and of those 27 eggs 25 were mature.
Recovery from egg retrieval was really rough for me. I expected to be bloated, tender, and out of it for a couple days. Potentially getting OHSS making it worse but I didn't expect what I went through at all. My retrieval was on a Thursday so I took Thursday and Friday off and I always have the weekend off. So 4 days recover which I figured was plenty based on other stories I had read. I figured I would still be sore but it would be manageable. By Friday I was in extreme pain, considering going to the ER because I had no idea what was going on. Every time I moved I screamed I was in so much pain. I could only sit 1 way and I couldn't sleep laying down no matter how much I wanted to. We talked to my nurse and she said she thought I was just constipated due to what I had told her and because everything was swollen from IVF it was making it worse. We told her what stool softened I had been taking and she mentioned to take 2 others instead. Saturday nothing had changed. I still couldn't sleep laying down and I was waking up every couple hours due to shifting and being in pain. I couldn't get up or do ANYTHING without help. Saturday John got me some milk of magnesia which is supposed to work relatively quickly without being too harsh on the system. So literally at this point I have taken 4 different stool softeners to ease/relieve the pain. I was desperate for something to work.
Overall it took me a week and a half to recover. Even once I had some relief from the constipation I still couldn't sleep laying down for a couple days. Once I could I was only able to sleep on my back and I still couldn't get up own my own. Normally in an IVF you transfer 3 or 5 days after your egg retrieval. Because I was in so much pain we had to do a freeze all which meant when we were ready we would have to do a frozen embryo transfer (FET).
Our September IVF Results:
27 eggs retrieved - 25 mature
18 fertilized via ICSI
18 made it to day 3
6 made it to day 5
10 total made it to day 6 freeze <3
Upcoming: Absolute Thank You To My Husband
Friday, December 15, 2017
What We've Been Up To
March 2017 John and I started searching for a new RE to pursue IVF with because ours left the clinic we were at. In April we had a consult with Dr. Dayal at SIRM in St. Louis. We knew instantly she was the Dr we wanted to see for our infertility treatments going forward. Her and her clinic are amazing. We felt like she genuinely cared about our journey but also gave us all of the information we needed. She has always been willing to answer any and all questions we have ever had. Late April and May we went through all the prerequisites our clinic has; all new labs, semen analysis, SHG, and carrier screenings for John and I.
Finally in July we were ready to start our first IVF cycle. We were so excited to finally be making progress toward our dream of having a family. Our giant box of medications came in and really started to sink in. Slowly I started taking the medication per the calendar my clinic gave me. At my first ultrasound things were progressing but obviously slower than they liked so my Dr upped my medication doses. Two ultrasounds later my Dr and I agreed that we should cancel our IVF because my follicles were not growing correctly. If we had continued we would have only been able to retrieve 5 or less which would have been a waste of time and money.
Even though I agreed with my Dr I was disappointed to say the least. We had been waiting over a year to do IVF and on our first attempt things already didn't go well. However I trusted my Dr and she mentioned that she believed increasing my medications would do the trick. She sounded really confident in this which made me feel better. I also knew I was only the lowest medication protocol my clinic has because my Dr was worried about over-stimulation because I have pcos. So it only made sense that increasing medication doses would have a positive impact. Our goal was was to try IVF again in August but due to an increase in our medication cost we had to postpone until September.
Upcoming: Our September IVF
Finally in July we were ready to start our first IVF cycle. We were so excited to finally be making progress toward our dream of having a family. Our giant box of medications came in and really started to sink in. Slowly I started taking the medication per the calendar my clinic gave me. At my first ultrasound things were progressing but obviously slower than they liked so my Dr upped my medication doses. Two ultrasounds later my Dr and I agreed that we should cancel our IVF because my follicles were not growing correctly. If we had continued we would have only been able to retrieve 5 or less which would have been a waste of time and money.
Even though I agreed with my Dr I was disappointed to say the least. We had been waiting over a year to do IVF and on our first attempt things already didn't go well. However I trusted my Dr and she mentioned that she believed increasing my medications would do the trick. She sounded really confident in this which made me feel better. I also knew I was only the lowest medication protocol my clinic has because my Dr was worried about over-stimulation because I have pcos. So it only made sense that increasing medication doses would have a positive impact. Our goal was was to try IVF again in August but due to an increase in our medication cost we had to postpone until September.
Upcoming: Our September IVF
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
